The 4 Mistakes That Shape Every High Performer (Day 14)

We all want to show up at our best.

To perform well.

To prove we’ve got what it takes.

But no matter how good you are — mistakes happen.

They can make us feel vulnerable, frustrated, even exposed.

Recently, I've noticed how hard I can be on myself after making small errors — like I need to prove I’m past that level — when really, the mistake is just showing me where I still get to improve.

It got me reflecting: your relationship with mistakes might be the most important factor in how far you go in life.

While most people try to avoid mistakes, high performers seek them out.

They don’t see mistakes as proof they aren’t good enough — they see them as opportunities to learn and get better.

And that excites them.

High Performers Make More Mistakes

Most people stay in their comfort zone — where things are safe, familiar, and the chance of messing up is low.

But if you want to grow, you’ve got to step outside that.

High performers understand that mistakes aren’t failures, they’re feedback.

So they put themselves in uncomfortable environments where their skills are tested to the limits.

And when you do? Mistakes are inevitable.

The question is: what do you do with them?

This morning I was reading The Performance Paradox by Eduardo Briceño, where he outlines four types of mistakes — each with something different to teach you.

The 4 Types of Mistakes (And What They Teach You)

1.Sloppy Mistakes

These are the mistakes that make you shake your head, because you knew better.

As soon as you make them you have an instant regret or frustration. It's not that you lacked the skill or information — it’s that you slipped up, even when the right move was clear.

For example:

• Calling a bluff catcher in poker when you knew your opponent wasn’t bluffing.

• Making an unforced error in a tennis rally because you went for too much.

• Hitting send on an important email with simple spelling mistakes.

They often come from impatience, ego, fatigue, or just not being fully present in the moment.

Sloppy mistakes are frustrating — not because you don’t understand what went wrong, but because you do.

The upside? They’re usually the easiest to fix. A bit more awareness, presence, or restraint, and you catch them before they happen next time.

2. High-Stakes Mistakes

These are the mistakes you make when the pressure is on and the outcome matters.

The kind that get replayed in your head because of the consequences attached to them.

For example:

• Freezing up on a big river bluff when you’ve planned the hand perfectly until then.

• Missing an overhead smash on match point in a close final.

• Getting overwhelmed by the pressure of a big moment and not being able to think.

They usually stem from nerves, fear, or a sudden shift into self-consciousness.

These mistakes can be painful, but they teach you how you handle pressure — and where your composure breaks down.

And like anything, performance under pressure is trainable.

3. Aha Moment Mistakes

These are the mistakes that give you insight.

You mess up, and suddenly see something you hadn’t seen before.

For example:

• Realising your current strategy is playing right into your opponent’s strength.

• Noticing how your rushed morning routine affects your ability to focus all day.

• Overstepping in a conversation, and becoming aware of a blind spot in how you communicate.

These mistakes sting, yet also spark a lightbulb.

They help you make important adjustments you wouldn’t have made without messing up first.

The key is being open enough to reflect and curious enough to connect the dots.

4. Stretch Mistakes

These are the mistakes that happen when you’re out of your comfort zone — trying something new, harder, or unfamiliar.

Although it can feel like you are failing, these are essential growing pains.

For example:

• Trying a new technique in padel and mishitting it repeatedly.

• Taking a shot against tougher poker opponents and getting punished.

• Practicing public speaking and fumbling your words in front of a group.

These mistakes aren’t signs that you’re not good enough — they’re signs that you’re pushing yourself.

They’re frustrating in the short term, but vital in the long run.

Most people avoid these by staying safe. But if you can embrace them, you’ll improve faster than anyone hiding behind their current skill level.

How This Shows Up in Real Life

It’s one thing to talk about mistake types, but it’s another to actually see them in your day-to-day life.

To make this more real, here’s how I’ve been experiencing all four types lately — through something I’m learning and trying to get better at right now: padel.

I’ve been playing a lot recently — training, competing, and pushing to improve.

And it’s given me a front-row seat to all kinds of mistakes.

Sloppy Mistakes: The Cost of Being Half There

On Friday, I played in a tournament — and made a lot of unforced errors.

Missed returns. Poor shot selection. Lobs hit too deep. Points rushed.

All the kinds of mistakes that had nothing to do with skill and everything to do with presence.

When I reflected on it after the match, a few things stood out:

• I’d gone to the gym beforehand — my upper body felt heavy and stiff.

• I wasn’t mentally locked in — I kept drifting between points.

• I was trying to win points too quickly, instead of building them patiently.

These are classic sloppy mistakes — things I knew better than to do, but still did. Now I’m more aware of what contributed, so I can adjust next time.

Aha Moment Mistakes: A Well Timed Mishit

A few days later, I made a different kind of mistake — one that actually helped us win.

We were getting dominated by two aggressive net players. They were smashing everything so we stopped lobbing as much out of fear.

Then I mis-hit a shot that went high in the air before landing deep and bouncing off the back glass — and suddenly, they couldn’t handle it. That was the moment we realised: they weren’t comfortable with the glass.

From that one mistake, our whole strategy shifted — we started playing deep into the glass, and the game changed completely.

We later found out they were tennis players who were still adjusting to padel.

It was a perfect aha moment mistake: a mis-hit that revealed something valuable we couldn’t have seen otherwise.

Stretch Mistakes: Growing Through Discomfort

Lately, I’ve been working on my attacking overheads with a coach.

In training, they’re coming along. But in matches, I still hesitate and I mess them up often.

It’s frustrating — but it’s exactly what a stretch mistake looks like.

I’m trying to do something I haven’t mastered yet.

And the only way to close that gap is by getting more reps in — which means making more mistakes, not fewer.

I also experience stretch mistakes every time I play stronger opponents.

In padel you can choose who you play:

• Below your level → You win more, look good, but learn little.

• At your level → It’s competitive, you improve steadily.

• Above your level → You lose more, but you grow faster.

I always lean toward the third option. Because when the game is faster and more demanding, my weaknesses get exposed.

I make more mistakes, but I also learn what needs work.

High-Stakes Mistakes: Not Overthinking

And of course, there are moments where the pressure’s on — tight scoreline, match point, everything on the line.

These are the moments where it’s easy to tighten up.

To overthink.

To make a mistake not because you don’t know what to do — but because you care so much about doing it well.

Thankfully, I feel like I handle these situations fairly well, at least most of the time.

But even then, there are still moments where I play too cautiously, especially against aggressive teams.

That’s something I’m working on — playing with courage and clarity even when the stakes are high.

Padel is just one context — but these same patterns show up everywhere.

In work. In relationships. In anything you're trying to get better at.

The point is: mistakes are part of the game.

If you know what kind you're making — and what they’re trying to teach you — they stop being a problem and start becoming your greatest teacher.

How This Question Can Shift Your Entire Approach

This is the question I keep coming back to:

"Are you here to perform or to learn?"

It’s easy to blur the line between the two.

We want to grow, but we also want to look good while doing it.

We say we’re open to learning, but deep down we’re hoping not to make too many mistakes along the way.

That’s why this question matters.

If I decide I’m here to perform — say, in a tournament against players at my level — then my job is to show up fully.

To manage my energy. To minimise sloppy mistakes. To still reflect and learn, yes — but with the goal of delivering my best right now.

If I decide I’m here to learn — say, in a training session or a match against tougher players — then I expect to make more mistakes.

Stretch mistakes. Aha moment mistakes. Even the occasional high-stakes slip.

And in that mode, I don’t need to be perfect — I need to be open.

Curious. Humble. Willing to fail in service of getting better.

You can’t be in both modes fully at the same time.

But knowing which one you’re in can change everything about how you interpret your mistakes.

Final Reflection

Mistakes aren’t something to fear, they’re signals.

Little messengers trying to show you where your growth edge is.

Some are frustrating.

Some are painful.

Some are incredibly useful.

But all of them, if you’re willing to reflect, can become fuel.

So next time you catch yourself beating yourself up for getting something wrong, pause and ask:

The more honest you are in answering those questions, the faster you grow.

In the end, it’s not about avoiding mistakes.

It’s about learning to use them — and trusting they’re part of the process.

Adam